66 Comments

Extroverts have an easier first contact. It's like with handsome people. However, at the end, we want to do business with thrustful people, irrespective of whether they are introverts or extroverts.

Expand full comment

Love this, well said. Building that relationship and earning trust is always the prime directive, no doubt about it!

Expand full comment
author

It's the foundation for a relationship and a sale is a type of relationship too, but we tend to focus on the transaction.

Expand full comment

Totally align with this. How we frame marketing and sales and distinguish between them matters.

Marketing: Telling true stories to people whose lives will be enhanced by colliding with your idea, product, service, or cause.

Sales: Leveraging empathetic antagonism to encourage people who resonate with your marketing to invest in and adopt your idea, product, service, or cause to make a change they want happen.

Done well, neither marketing nor sales doesn’t lead to any regrets with either the buyer or seller.

Expand full comment
author

Yes and when they work in combination, it's a pretty good strategy.

I believe a big part of writers don't succeed because they focus only on writing and forget about sales and marketing.

Expand full comment

Two things came to mind reading your article Veronica.

This coming from a life long introvert, that’s been doing sales (with another name for it) for decades.

1) I see “sell” as a four letter word spelled h-e-l-p

If what we’re offering (product, service, subscription, etc.) will provide incredible value then we are really helping the other person.

In that case why wouldn’t we want to get out of our cocoon and bring it to them?

Your tip on building trust first is spot on for this.

2) Should we build a different identity, other than ‘introvert’, to make selling/helping easier?

Maybe a new identity is too strong, but at least realize we are playing a role, the role of a helper with our product/service/subscription/etc.

And when playing this role we act and speak accordingly, different than how we are at home or with friends. Not being fake, that’s something else entirely.

To build trust in what we offer we have to personify our message, like you say, open ourselves up. Just assuming the role of a helper while you sell it.

When I was in school my role was to be the best student (yes, nerd and proud of it).

When I was an engineer my role was to design, create and implement tech solutions.

When I reached executive positions my role was to be a leader and empower my teams.

When I became an entrepreneur my role was to create outstanding products and services, and be a leader and empower my team.

When I am coaching or mentoring my role is to be a guide.

But I am the same introvert I’ve always been, just adapting to the role that the situation requires.

Have you thought about it this way?

Expand full comment
author

Spot on, Ramon: instead of starting with the outcome (the sale), we start with the why (helping) and we have to adapt our personality to be able to channel that.

I love your approach of modeling your style to the situation and totally agree. You have to know what skills to flex when to get the best outcome.

PS: I was a nerd too ;)

Expand full comment

P.S. I still am ☺️

Expand full comment
author

😂

Expand full comment

Selling online is a lot easier than selling in person.

I have tried both

Expand full comment
author

Interesting!

Can you explain in what sense?

Expand full comment
founding

I believe the cringe about selling is because we feel we've been pressured to buy in the past and we hated it. But if we hear someone offering us help, it's in their voice and choice of words. It's an exchange. No pressure. In trust. Win win.

Great takeaways here, thank you Veronica.

Expand full comment
author

So true, Jeanette!

We have our own preconceived idea of what selling is like but it's up to us to define it and find our way.

I'm glad you liked it and thank you for stopping by.

Expand full comment

Grateful for Your Lemon Tree. I ‘happened’ to plant one about 18 months ago long before I’d heard of Substack. It’s bearing blossom AND fruit right now. A small picture of what I’m hoping for with my new Substack. Thanking you for your inspiration and encouragement! Glad to have discovered you on Substack. Looking forward to reading more. Your generosity is like the glorious fragrance of my little lemon tree.

Expand full comment
author

What a lovely story, Penelope!

Please tag me when you post that picture.

I believe we can all grow together by sharing and supporting each other.

Thank you for sharing this.

Expand full comment

Good takeaways. I like the idea of helping rather than selling. I've been on Substack for 2 months now and have done zero selling or promoting. Although I have gained a lot of insights from writing, I do think maybe I should start taking this writing more "serious" and promote it but not be an annoying sales person. So there's some great points here. Thanks for sharing!

Expand full comment
author

That's great Ellina, and I hope these ideas help you find your own way of selling. You definitely have to promote yourself on Substack but it doesn't have to be aggressive.

I'm glad the article was useful.

Expand full comment
founding

Veronica, this is again a fantastic post from you! I agree with all the comments above, but add two points:

1. Your thin athletic body cannot be seen behind your absolutely huge heart!

2. How in the hell are you introvert? You open your heart and you penetrate through our skins to touch our heart. This is extrovert for me in the most beautiful way!

Expand full comment
author

Thank you, Zsolt, your words always put a smile on my face.

Introverts and extroverts make a good team together ;)

Expand full comment
founding

Glad to cause smile on your beautiful face. If I deep-search myself, as a little school-boy, I was a bit shy, but frankly, already extrovert. I was the lead bull in the herd for most of my life. On my bday party there were 4 of my former bosses and I was the former boss of 91.

Expand full comment
author

That's awesome but I have a question: was that your 80th birthday party?

I don't usually have 100 people attend my birhtday ;)

Expand full comment
founding

On my 75th my colleagues from 1991-2013 were present: 60 people. Now my colleagues from 1967-1990 joined. 15 of them were part of both periods. It was close to 100 people and a thousand tight hugs. Love overflown. No exaggeration, just pure love. Incredible...

Expand full comment
founding

I ruin my minimalist effort, and add more: it is unbelievable that so many people still love me so much after having been decades apart. I must have helped them in growing and delivering, which they appreciate. Still having a bond based on team spirit and exemplary professionalism. I never behaved as a boss, rather a proud one of them. I did everything to be a herd bull worth to follow.

Expand full comment
author

Hahaha, you won't score high for minimalist writing on this one, but I will give you a 10 for storytelling ;)

Expand full comment
founding

Brilliant. Love the switch from selling to helping.

You helped me a ton in our private session around lifting the curtain and sharing more with a focus on building trust. Thanks as always Veronica.

Expand full comment
author

Thank you, Prince!

I loved our session too and btw, I really enjoyed the new more streamlined formatting of your latest newsletter.

Keep it up!

Expand full comment

I love this take on selling. As a true introvert, the thought of any kind of sales used to make me want to vomit. I still would never work in a sales position, and honestly when I did work in certain customer service areas there were times where I almost felt like I was lying because situationally it would not have benefited the customer but the impetus was to sell regardless.

Now, as a writer who is trying to sell their work, I feel like I can be completely honest and that has helped in being able to "sell myself" as an author. I also love your points about making connections and giving without thought of receiving, and I think especially with writers it is so often more about community than it is about sales. Which, paradoxically, produces more sales, in my opinion, organically.

Expand full comment

I’m finding this same thing, Kendra. Focusing on my identity as a writer and connecting with/uplifting my readers and feeling really good about offering them the opportunity to support my work if it’s been meaningful to them. And coming up with more interesting ways to serve them!

Expand full comment
author

Thank you for sharing, Kendra.

Writing is amazing because it allows you to be 100% honest and you don't have to sell anything you don't believe in.

Authenticity and selling must go hand in hand.

I agree that building connections and giving without asking for a sale are ironically the way to drive sales.

I hope it will help you in the future.

Expand full comment

Great advice! Thanks, Veronica.

Expand full comment
author

You are welcome, Laurence, I'm glad you liked it.

Expand full comment

Wow! This really spoke to me Veronica. I've always had a really hard time selling myself. I always give caveats or apologize when I talk to someone about my coaching. The thing is, I really believe in it, and I know I can help people, but it makes me feel icky when I talk about price or cost. It's like (in my head) if you really wanted to help people, then you should do it for free or be very low cost. I appreciate your words of wisdom and will take them to heart. ❤️ Thank you!

Expand full comment
author

I totally hear you, Daria, because I used to be the same.

Now I openly talk about my coaching sessions, my public speaking and my services, but the focus is different: it's on impact, helping and adding value.

That makes it easier and natural.

Thank you for your lovely note.

Expand full comment
founding

I love this article. Besides the word, "giving," I also love the word, "contributing." Contributing, authentically, from your heart to theirs, out to make a difference in their life.

I also like what Benjamin and Rosamund Zander say about "Enrolling" in their book, The Art of Possibility-- "lighting the spark of possibility" in another.

Expand full comment
author

Thank you, Amba, giving and contributing are the foundation of building trust and selling.

Thank you for the references, I will check them out.

Expand full comment
founding

Wonderful.

Who I am is Enrollment. My Life is enrollment. So is yours. You light the "spark of possibility" for others in whatever you touch.

You touch my life.

You have inspired me to write a blog of my own, inside my own Substack, on Enrollment. It's funny. I COACH people in enrollment, and, never though of writing a Substack article on the subject.

I am so appreciative of your work.

You are going to LOVE the book, "The Art of Possibility," by the Zanders, I know.

Veronica, I bought Lemon Tree Mindset, and look forward to reading it.

Expand full comment
author

That’s wonderful, Amba.

The beautiful thing here is that you mention that I inspired you to write your blog, but this will go on, and you will inspire others to start something new too and magic will live on.

Thank you for your support.

Expand full comment

Positive stuff here, thanks Veronica!

Expand full comment
author

You are welcome, Jeanine.

I'm happy you got the good vibes!

Expand full comment

Once again, you speak directly and clearly to my condition. Thanks!

Expand full comment
author

Thank you, Tricia, I'm happy it touched you ;)

Expand full comment