How To Sell As An Introvert Who Hates Selling

From selling to building trust

Jul 27, 2024

What comes to mind when you think of a salesperson?

Let’s be honest here.

We are thinking exactly the same: someone loud and obnoxious trying to sell you a bunch of accessories you don’t need and making you feel like a walking commission.

I don’t want to be that person.

You don’t want to be that person.

However, chances are, both you and I need to sell something for a living: a product, a service, and, more importantly, ourselves.

The expression “buy into someone” is shockingly accurate:

We need to sell ourselves day in and day out so that recruiters hire us, hotties swipe right, employers promote us, investors fund us, and readers upgrade their subscriptions (hint, hint).

But how do you get people to buy into you without feeling awkward and icky?

You don’t sell. You build trust.

And that’s a different ball game.

Selling is not about a product, a service, or a Black Friday sale. It’s about creating an emotional connection through TRUST.

People focus so much on selling that they forget that buying is a personal process that relies on the currency of trust.

People like going to the same doctor, physio, or personal trainer. Why? Because there’s an emotional attachment built on trust.

Our decisions and purchases are motivated by trust, either directly or indirectly.

- 9 in 10 consumers say they consider reviews when making a purchase (PowerReview 2023). They trust the opinions of other consumers.

- According to The Rule of 7, people have to see your brand’s message 7 times before they decide to buy from you. They want to trust you first.

Don’t sell. Build trust.

This is how.

1. Show who you are

Use your voice, read your life story, and share who you are, not just what you do.

You don’t have to expose your privacy to the world, but you can turn cardinal points of your identity into community beacons.

I often talk about my passion for fitness and triathlon, my love for travel and languages, and my values and lifestyle as a mompreneur.

If you want me to buy from you, tell me who you are.

I want to know you, like you, and trust you first before I buy anything from you.

2. Lift the curtains

Don’t show us (only) your cabinet of trophies; show us the tears and sweat along the way. Open the vulnerability door and keep it real.

No one is perfect, and people bond through common flaws, struggles, and imperfections. It’s what creates human resonance.

I don’t trust the guy with a photoshopped Lambo telling me how to make 6 figures with his discounted cohort while I sleep.

I trust the woman who’s showing me how she’s building her business with the wins, the struggles and everything in between. I admire her backstage with all its chaos and messiness.

Ironically, people trust imperfection more than they trust perfection.

3. Make it about them

Trust is a two-way street.

Open communication channels and interact with your readers beyond the standard “Thank you for your comment.”

When people ask you questions, take the time to give a personalized answer and share resources. That’s how I have gained multiple clients.

When you really have nothing to say, simply reply, “Thank you, Ava,” “I appreciate it, Li.” Small details like using someone’s name go a long way.

Listen to your readers, consumers, and stakeholders. Ask for their feedback, read their comments, and give them a voice.

Most people like to talk about themselves; be the one who listens to others - and cares.

4. Focus on helping

As an introvert, I hate selling, but I love helping.

That change in words is not just semantics. It takes the relationship from transactional (a purchase) to transformational (a journey).

“Join my program to make 10,000$ in a month” is the type of crap we see on social media every day.

I honestly can’t predict how many books you will sell or how much your audience will grow if we work together, but I know I can help you clarify your vision, create a 360 strategy for your online business, and find your writing voice.

When I launch a new offer, I always change hats and think from the POV of the other person:

What’s the benefit?

How are they going to be better off?

Would I honestly pay for that service?

When your focus is on helping, your heart is in the right place: you want to discover the real issues and dig deeper to find the root cause so that you can offer a solution, not just a fancy band-aid.

Giving a discount drives sales.

Helping drives trust - and eventually more sales.

5. Give without asking

The most effective trick to sell?

It’s not promotions or discounts.

It’s being generous with your advice, experience, and knowledge.

A final little story about trust.

I recently had an unsubscription from a paid member. Ouch.

The Optimist's Way

sent me a message apologizing and saying that she had lost her job and couldn’t keep the monthly fee.

I knew she wanted to join my session on mindset with

Kristina God

so I gave her a free subscription. No questions asked, no conditions, no T&C.

The result was an incredible testimonial with a handwritten note and all!

My playbook to build trust (and sell)

Show who you are
Share your backstage
Make it about them
Focus on helping
Give without asking

And remember…people have to see you 7 times before they buy from you, so here is number 1 😉

The Lemon Tree Mindset 🌳🍋

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